So I am in a much better frame of mind these days, and, I have to confess, I owe this newfound peacefulness to the wonders of modern medicine. I'm not freaking out too often about what will happen when my severance and insurance runs out. Instead, I've been able to turn it from nervous panicky energy to productive work.
Whew, I'd almost forgotten what that felt like.
It's so nice that chemical imbalances in your brain can be fixed if you happen to get lucky and find the right medicine that works for you. It is such an amazing sensation to be able to finally take grasp of my ability to focus and keep it on something long enough to accomplished it.
I can tell that today's been the first of many exciting days to come. I'm so looking forward to discovering where my life's path's leads me next.
Have a wonderful evening everyone!
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Monday, September 14, 2009
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
Broadening my horizons...
I had the most wonderful visit today to a Hindu Mandir (temple) here in Atlanta. It was absolutely gorgeous and the meditation room was awe-inspiring. This was actually my second visit.
When you first enter the temple, you have to take off your shoes. When you get into the meditation room, it is like a light blue/white glow emanating from the area.There is no talking and cell phones have to be on silent. The first time I entered, I was so stunned by the sight that all I could do was gaze in amazement at the beauty and peacefulness. And then I started slowly walking through the room and almost every space was intricately carved in white stone. It is so interesting how there is this theme of similarity and difference within the meditation area. The same stone, but so many details.
It was such a beautiful experience. I sat and meditated in under one of the large domed areas and I felt so unstressed when I was done. I'm so thankful I was able to experience such a wondrous place.
When you first enter the temple, you have to take off your shoes. When you get into the meditation room, it is like a light blue/white glow emanating from the area.There is no talking and cell phones have to be on silent. The first time I entered, I was so stunned by the sight that all I could do was gaze in amazement at the beauty and peacefulness. And then I started slowly walking through the room and almost every space was intricately carved in white stone. It is so interesting how there is this theme of similarity and difference within the meditation area. The same stone, but so many details.
It was such a beautiful experience. I sat and meditated in under one of the large domed areas and I felt so unstressed when I was done. I'm so thankful I was able to experience such a wondrous place.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Late night musings
My brain is a whirlwind of ideas. It's a good thing I've got some time to figure out which direction(s) to go in from a professional perspective. I've got a few different passions in addition to some unique ideas that I'm interested in trying. I'm finding that I'm so excited about all the different opportunities, it's hard to focus on any one at a time.
And I've also discovered that it is hard for me to relax and take a vacation with my brain constantly whirling. Don't get me wrong, I have gotten some quiet time, and I feel much less stressed now than I did in June... But I have discovered that it is in my nature to always be planning or thinking about what comes next. I have to balance that habit with also living in the moment and not taking those moments for granted. It's amazing how wonderful things can happen in the most ordinary of situations... like the way my husband looked at me this morning, just one glance and I know I am loved to the moon and beyond.
Or take the grocery store today...
My daughter and I are at the cash register and the cashier looks at me funny when I say she's my daughter. Then I explain she's actually my stepdaughter but while we're not biologically related, our hearts are. The cashier gives us an incredulous look because she thought we really were related. We actually get that fairly often. A lot of times people mistake us for sisters... which does my ego quite a bit of good to be able to pull that one off. Hopefully, one day in the far future, I'll look like an aunt instead of a grandma. = )
It amazes me that I have so much in common with my girls, but in different ways with each daughter. It sometimes feels like they each have a part of my personality, but it's been that way since the first day I met them when they were 3 and 8. My youngest daughter calls herself an animal freak... that's one of my favorite parts that I share with her... that and her moral compass. With my oldest, I think the best way to describe it is her thoughtful compassion. It fills me with pride every time she handles odd or hectic situations in such an adult and responsible manner.
I am proud that I'm helping to raise such amazing young women, and I'm so very grateful to their mother for sharing them with me.
So where am I going with this... Don't get into the habit of taking your loved ones for granted. Appreciate them, be with them, and pay attention to those ordinary but special moments.
Have a beautiful day!
And I've also discovered that it is hard for me to relax and take a vacation with my brain constantly whirling. Don't get me wrong, I have gotten some quiet time, and I feel much less stressed now than I did in June... But I have discovered that it is in my nature to always be planning or thinking about what comes next. I have to balance that habit with also living in the moment and not taking those moments for granted. It's amazing how wonderful things can happen in the most ordinary of situations... like the way my husband looked at me this morning, just one glance and I know I am loved to the moon and beyond.
Or take the grocery store today...
My daughter and I are at the cash register and the cashier looks at me funny when I say she's my daughter. Then I explain she's actually my stepdaughter but while we're not biologically related, our hearts are. The cashier gives us an incredulous look because she thought we really were related. We actually get that fairly often. A lot of times people mistake us for sisters... which does my ego quite a bit of good to be able to pull that one off. Hopefully, one day in the far future, I'll look like an aunt instead of a grandma. = )
It amazes me that I have so much in common with my girls, but in different ways with each daughter. It sometimes feels like they each have a part of my personality, but it's been that way since the first day I met them when they were 3 and 8. My youngest daughter calls herself an animal freak... that's one of my favorite parts that I share with her... that and her moral compass. With my oldest, I think the best way to describe it is her thoughtful compassion. It fills me with pride every time she handles odd or hectic situations in such an adult and responsible manner.
I am proud that I'm helping to raise such amazing young women, and I'm so very grateful to their mother for sharing them with me.
So where am I going with this... Don't get into the habit of taking your loved ones for granted. Appreciate them, be with them, and pay attention to those ordinary but special moments.
Have a beautiful day!
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Returning to my personal blog
So I've taken a roller coaster ride in my work life these last six months. I am now laid off, but unexpectedly, happier than I've been in a long time...
With the exception of the intense diversity and inclusion work I had been involved with at my former company, I was completely burnt out on the job that I had. I was really good at it, but it didn't really challenge me. And I discovered that a bored Tams is not a happy Tams, especially from a career perspective.
Speaking of perspectives, I've done a lot of introspection this last month. I didn't plan to spend my vacation laid up with a sprained ankle, but I think perhaps I needed it... the time and space to sit with myself (and have time with my family, both people and pets). I discovered I had to learn how to breathe all over again. My conclusions are that I do not at all feel guilty for being laid off (I tend to more judgmental about myself than others). I do not think I would have been happy staying in the same kind of role for another few years. And I would have missed out on some of the most amazing moments of my motherhood this month.
Instead, I am happy that I've got this cushion in which I can think about new things and explore new challenges, and that I can target them to somehow find a way to earn enough to support the family, yet work at home so I have more time to spend with my family. They are the best de-stressers in the world! I am thankful every day for them.
With the exception of the intense diversity and inclusion work I had been involved with at my former company, I was completely burnt out on the job that I had. I was really good at it, but it didn't really challenge me. And I discovered that a bored Tams is not a happy Tams, especially from a career perspective.
Speaking of perspectives, I've done a lot of introspection this last month. I didn't plan to spend my vacation laid up with a sprained ankle, but I think perhaps I needed it... the time and space to sit with myself (and have time with my family, both people and pets). I discovered I had to learn how to breathe all over again. My conclusions are that I do not at all feel guilty for being laid off (I tend to more judgmental about myself than others). I do not think I would have been happy staying in the same kind of role for another few years. And I would have missed out on some of the most amazing moments of my motherhood this month.
Instead, I am happy that I've got this cushion in which I can think about new things and explore new challenges, and that I can target them to somehow find a way to earn enough to support the family, yet work at home so I have more time to spend with my family. They are the best de-stressers in the world! I am thankful every day for them.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Appreciating What You Have
While I'm not a religious person, I do have a deep sense of spirituality, and it's always seemed to well up in me when I see something beautiful in nature... a sunset, the fall colors, spring flowers. I guess it's because I'm the "independant cuss" my momma always teased me about being. I just don't see the need to have someone else tell me what and how to believe. If I had to really nail down a belief system, I'd have to say that I believe in all kinds of Love... Love of family, friends, nature, country, etc.
I had a spiritual ah hah the other day. Lke many people, I've spent a lot of time worrying and stressing about so many different things: bills, career, home stuff. So much so that I had worn myself out. And I realized that while I believe in Love, I was giving myself very little of it. I'm not talking narcissistic love, but genuine appreciation and care for my self, inside and out.
Appreciate what I have... That's something it's so hard to do sometimes... to let go and simply take joy in what you have in you and around you that is good. For once, I didn't put things off for another day, and I took my own advice.
And as a result, I had the absolute best Christmas vacation I've ever had... not because of a whole lot of presents (something I'd been worrying a lot about)... but because I was able to spend amazing time with my husband, with our daughters, with his parents (who are another mom and dad to me), with my mom, sister and brother-in-law and nephew.
It was so beautiful, and while it was a lot of work, it was more than worth it.
Take time for yourselves and those you care about. Appreciate what you have, and in doing so, you may discover a richness and beauty in your life that you never knew you had.
Love to all,
Tammy
I had a spiritual ah hah the other day. Lke many people, I've spent a lot of time worrying and stressing about so many different things: bills, career, home stuff. So much so that I had worn myself out. And I realized that while I believe in Love, I was giving myself very little of it. I'm not talking narcissistic love, but genuine appreciation and care for my self, inside and out.
Appreciate what I have... That's something it's so hard to do sometimes... to let go and simply take joy in what you have in you and around you that is good. For once, I didn't put things off for another day, and I took my own advice.
And as a result, I had the absolute best Christmas vacation I've ever had... not because of a whole lot of presents (something I'd been worrying a lot about)... but because I was able to spend amazing time with my husband, with our daughters, with his parents (who are another mom and dad to me), with my mom, sister and brother-in-law and nephew.
It was so beautiful, and while it was a lot of work, it was more than worth it.
Take time for yourselves and those you care about. Appreciate what you have, and in doing so, you may discover a richness and beauty in your life that you never knew you had.
Love to all,
Tammy
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